I Missed Last Week. (And I'm happy about it.)

Time to read: 35 seconds

Gold stars, please for this clean pantry!

Twelve years. Every Thursday. Last week I failed, and I feel great about it.

Here's why:

I was in a board meeting. I was at my parents' house, helping them with the things parents eventually need help with. Thursday just slipped by. I didn't notice until Friday.

Here's what I want you to notice: I'm not apologizing.

We are skilled at apologizing for being human, and I want to model that it's ok to drop a ball sometimes.

Sometimes the most honest thing a leader can do is let a Thursday go. Be in the room with the board. Be in the kitchen with your parents. Be where life and work actually are.

Not doing something — really, consciously choosing not to — is one of the most underrated leadership moves there is. It's not laziness. It's discernment.

So if you missed something this week, or chose your people over your list, or just ran out of runway: don't spiral. Ask yourself — was anything actually broken?

I bet nothing was.

Email me and tell me. I really do want to know.

My Opinion About Your #1 Priority. :-)

Time to read: 35 seconds

More custom charm bracelets for my daughter's scientific friends

Last week, I said I do humans. Humans are the center of my personal and professional life.

Remember? Humans are my favorite!

I’m rather old-fashioned about humans. I think humans need each other…live and in person.

We are a communal species. That doesn’t mean you have to live with other people or even like all other people, although it helps if you like a few other people. And, it makes things much easier and fulfilling to have other humans to share life with.

Good relationships create opportunities. Good relationships provide support. And entertainment. Wonky ones get in the way. My private clients know I always recommend prioritizing relationships at work.

• Pay attention to the personal aspects of people’s lives.
• Look for ways to help.
• Write HAND-WRITTEN thank you notes.
• Be generous with compliments.
• Be generous in general.

In case you need repetition for a message to sink in, relationships are crucial. So crucial, they are your #1 priority, today and always.

Living With Chaos: Use Your Gifts

Time to read: 43 seconds

Sticking with the charm bracelets cuz I love them so!

Welcome to week 7 of Living with Chaos. Invite your friends to join sign up here.

I promised I would share how to live, especially when it feels like things are falling apart.

The first step is to focus on your corner of the universe. You can't boil the ocean. Consider people like Paul Farmer, Martin Luther King, and Marie Curie. These are ordinary people, doing their work, pursuing things that matter to them, and using their gifts in the world.

I used famous examples to make the point. Most of us are never going to be world famous, and never underestimate your power. You can make a huge difference in your world by changing the stressed-out tone at work, volunteering your time and talent, cleaning up the stream near your house, or getting involved in a location organization. I could go on and on with ideas. It's easy to get bogged down in questions like "where to start?" or "it's all too much."

You know your world and who needs you. You know your gifts and how to bring them out. Go do that.

Remember, it's your life. Getting out there with your gifts is one great way to LIVE.

P.S. Email me here if you want a custom charm bracelet. I LOVE making them for people. They make great gifts!

Lessons I Live By #4. No Such Thing As Win-Lose

Time to read: a few short seconds

1960s Bambi and Faline. Some of you won't care (like my husband. Someone of you will love them!)

Once upon a time, back in my corporate days, our main competitor had a major win in the market. I observed to one of my colleagues that this was bad news. "They win, we lose," right?

She said actually, a win for our competitor was good news for us because it meant there was a pathway and market for our similar products. Ah, that is what win-win looks like.

In life and work, your only options are win-win and lose-lose. Win-lose is a fallacy based on scarcity and fear. Win-lose implies there isn't enough to go around, and puts you in constant competition with your colleagues, friends, and neighbors. The fact is that someone else's success means success (however you define it) is available to you, too.

A rising tide raises all ships. Look for ways to raise the tide and find a win-win. It's good for you, and good for everyone else, too.

If you love this newsletter, please share it with your colleagues. They can sign up here.

What's The Best Use Of You

Time to read: 1 min 2 seconds

Lately I've been thinking a lot about purpose, and what it means to spend your day living meaningfully and purposefully. This season of reflection is a good time to consider this question:

What is the best use of you?

You know you are at your best use when you feel "well-used" by the end of most days. When you feel like the way you spend your time uses your unique gifts and talents. When you feel a sense of satisfaction, even if you didn't complete everything or it was hard. When you look back over a week and are proud of the way you spend your time.

The best use of you applies to work and the ways you support your family and friends, raise your children, care for your parents, volunteer in your community, and interact with strangers.

The implication of your best use is that there are also things that are NOT your best use. Like, maybe someone else should crunch the numbers or do the design or direct the difficult conversation.

For example, details are not the best use of me. Communication and relationships are. So, I rely on others in my life (my assistant, and my husband) to manage details while I handle sticky situations and awkward conversations. My husband is relieved. And so am I. It's a win-win.

We need a world where each of us is performing to our best use each day. What's yours?

Don't Do It Alone

Time to read: 35 seconds

These two do not normally get along

Last week I talked about how the human brain hates uncertainty. In the US, we have much uncertainty, and people tell me how anxious and unnerved they feel.

I certainly don't have all the answers, and I and the Corporate Rebel Masters group had a powerful call last week and came up with a number of…what to call them…solutions?…suggestions?…ways to be?… to help navigate these choppy waters.

Here is the first one: Don't go it alone.

When in liminal space (the powerful and uncomfortable in-between place), go in with others. Find and activate your community. Call your friends. Schedule dinner dates. Host parties. Drink tea (with friends). Go for walks (with others). Go into the office and see people live and in person.

Remind yourself of the love and support in your life, and the love and support you offer others. When your brain is exploding from the uncertainty, find your people and hold on tight!

More tips for navigating this season are coming right up in the coming weeks!

If you have friends who are anxious and uncomfortable please point them here. They can subscribe and join the conversation here.

Caring For Your Fried Brain

Time to read: So, so short

I notice at the end of summer, everyone goes to mush. People want to enjoy the last warm days, and no one wants to consider deep thoughts. Kids return to school, and routines shift back to the activity of fall. It’s paradoxically a lazy and chaotic time.

While enjoying your last weeks of summer and preparing for the rocket ship that is fall (whether you have children or not), the next few newsletters will take you quickly and easily back to the basics.

Here’s the context: The human brain is more flexible than researchers used to think. Into old age, your brain can change and learn new things. Brain flexibility is called “neuroplasticity.” For the next few weeks, I am going to share the 5 elements to maintain neuroplasticity and give you one simple challenge each week to enhance that element for yourself.

We’re going to keep it simple and immediately applicable. Please share this article with your colleagues. They can sign up here..