Time to read: 36 seconds
This is one of those exposing newsletters complete with a vulnerable story.
A few weeks ago, I yelled at a hotel clerk. When she asked if I wanted to speak to her manager, I said yes and then yelled at him, too. I have a long rope and reached the end of it. This was clearly not my finest moment.
Which brings me to today's practice Part 1, RECOVER.
You are human. I am human. Humans sometimes lose themselves or behave in ways you wish you hadn't. Moments like losing it on the hotel clerk, yelling at your kids, being short with a colleague are humbling and a sign that self-compassion, rest, and self-care are in order.
When stuff like this happens, you either step in to judge yourself ("I'm a terrible human being") or you blame the other person ("They were being unreasonable"). Both of these responses let you off the hook of ownership for yourself and the vulnerabilty of knowing you're fallible.
So, what do you do when you've behaved in ways you're not proud of?
There are two steps: RECOVER (Part 1) and REPAIR (Part 2 which is next week).
When you fly off the handle, you send a flood of chemicals into your brain and trigger your fight or flight response. This is not your most measured, kind, reasonable self. You need to give yourself time to clear the chemical tsunami.
To recover, take time and find your way back. Talk to a friend. Meditate. Sit quietly. Journal. Do whatever you need to find your ground and recover back to yourself.
Repair is not possible until you have recovered. So, next week, I'll give you a script for repair.