Lessons I Live By. #1

Time to read: 45 seconds

As 2025 gets rolling, I've been thinking, what are the essential tenants I live by as a coach? Over the 15 years of my training and work as a coach, I've learned and changed a lot (for the better, I hope)!

For the next few weeks, I'll share one principle I live by every day. Here's today's:

Your integrity matters. In fact, it's the only thing that matters. At work and in life, you make compromises. Your thoughts and opinions about things change as you mature so there's room for your definition of integrity to change, and each day, in every interaction, behave with integrity.

If you believe in kindness, then you must operate with kindness…in traffic, at the coffee shop, and with annoying family members. It's always about YOUR kindness, not THEIR behavior.

Many things try to seduce you away from your integrity…other people, money, opportunity, power, fear. Know where you get tempted and build strategies to support yourself in the face of challenges. Here are some possibilities:

  • Pay attention to how you feel in your interactions. You know when you are out of integrity.
  • Write notes to remind yourself of what you stand for and what matters.
  • Talk to friends when you wonder if you've compromised yourself.
  • Clean up your messes when you screw up.

Next week is for all you perfectionists!

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Setting Goals For The New Year

Time to read: 15 seconds

Adorable vintage stuff!

Even though it's been well established that I hate New Year, I still evaluate my year each January and set intentions and goals for the coming year. I recommend you bring consciousness to your life and career. Your one-word (from last week) is a great starting point.

Then set goals. Use a loose definition of goals like, intentions, areas for growth, stretches, and improvements. For example, one of my goals a few years ago was " to eat lunch every day." That is not a high-minded professional accomplishment. Instead, the goal was to learn to nourish my body. Over time, the goal grew into a realization that choosing my body helped temper my "over-perform at all costs" mentality. Even the simplest goal can lead to profound changes.

This year my most terrifying goal is "take time to read (without freaking out)." I love reading and usually only do it for a few seconds before I drop asleep at night. This goal requires me to learn to "do nothing" (my belief) and stop believing I have to strive all day to earn the right to sit. Honestly, even writing about reading quietly makes my stomach hurt. Clearly, this is a worthy stretch for me.

What's your terrifying goal for 2025?

 

Wanna Know Why I Hate New Year's? - Part 2

Time to read: 15 seconds

Sparkly 1950s necklace, cuz, why not?

Last week I offered a twisted Happy New Year, cuz, well, I hate New Year's.

However, I do think reflection and intention setting each year is fun and helpful. I personally do an in-depth performance evaluation of my year and then set intentions and goals. I'm a coach so, of course, I do stuff like this.

You can keep it simple. Find one word to steer 2025. Imagine how different your year will be with one of these as your word: simplify, freedom, focus, connection.

Do you see how one word can flavor the atmosphere for your entire year and drive experiences and choices?

This new year, choose one word for 2025 and see what happens. Please email me and tell me all about how it works out!

Happy New Year, again!

 

Wanna Know Why I Hate New Year's? - Part 1

Time to read: 15 seconds

Sparkly 1950s necklace, cuz, why not?

If you have followed me for a while, you already know that I hate New Year's…the staying up late, of course, but mostly, the pressure to have fun and make something different on January 1.

New Year's Resolutions? Bah humbug!

So, if the new year is not your favorite, you are not alone. I hope you got some sleep, had some fun, and are enjoying the start of 2025, free from pressure to transform in one turn of the calendar.

Happy New Year! Ha!

 

What's The Best Use Of You

Time to read: 1 min 2 seconds

Lately I've been thinking a lot about purpose, and what it means to spend your day living meaningfully and purposefully. This season of reflection is a good time to consider this question:

What is the best use of you?

You know you are at your best use when you feel "well-used" by the end of most days. When you feel like the way you spend your time uses your unique gifts and talents. When you feel a sense of satisfaction, even if you didn't complete everything or it was hard. When you look back over a week and are proud of the way you spend your time.

The best use of you applies to work and the ways you support your family and friends, raise your children, care for your parents, volunteer in your community, and interact with strangers.

The implication of your best use is that there are also things that are NOT your best use. Like, maybe someone else should crunch the numbers or do the design or direct the difficult conversation.

For example, details are not the best use of me. Communication and relationships are. So, I rely on others in my life (my assistant, and my husband) to manage details while I handle sticky situations and awkward conversations. My husband is relieved. And so am I. It's a win-win.

We need a world where each of us is performing to our best use each day. What's yours?

 

How Are You Compensated?

Time to read: 46 seconds

As we speed toward the end of the year, 'tis the season of year-end reviews and raises. I invite you to think about how you are compensated.

You are compensated with money, of course. I have a new side hustle selling vintage jewelry and housewares, and the money is certainly nice. However, if money were the only compensation, I'd be making pennies per hour. If money were your only compensation, you'd be a mercenary.

I hope you make more than pennies per hour. And, consider all the other ways you are compensated: travel, wonderful colleagues, free lunches, learning, challenges, things to talk about, and opportunities.

Most of the compensation for selling vintage items is social for me…the people I've gotten to know buying and selling. It's also good stories…funny things that happen, touching moments, and weird stuff and places.

Expand your thinking about your compensation, you'll find you are paid handsomely indeed!

 

Still Waiting….

Time to read: 46 seconds

Our monster cat

In the United States, the days are shorter and up here in the North, it's cold. Year-end has its own special bustle of strategic and budget planning and annual performance evaluations all combined with the holidays.

While you are busy planning 2025, I would like you to take a moment to plan your rest. What will you do in the coming weeks to rest and reflect as you prepare to draw the year to a close?

In athletics and physical training, rest is as crucial to building strength as work. So, be as serious and intentional about your rest as you are about your strategic plans and budgets.

Stay warm out there, my friends in the north!