Week 4: Do You Have To Choose?

Time to read: 41 seconds

Ah, wonderful costume jewelry.

Yes, you always choose. If living well is something you get to create, then not choosing is also a choice, just often not a good one.

Most of us don't refuse to live intentionally. You just let the calendar decide. The inbox decides. The next obligation decides. Weeks pass. You were busy the whole time. And, do you feel well-used, or were you drifting?

Drift feels safe because it seems like you don't have to choose. When in fact, you are choosing to drift. The cost will come later, in regret, missed opportunity, chances not taken.

This week, pick one place where you've been drifting. Keep it simple. Choose one. A relationship on autopilot. A habit you fell into. A "someday" that's been someday for years.

You don't need a five-year plan. You need one choice, one action, done intentionally, today.

Next week: What to do when your values and your circumstances don't line up.

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Week 3: Was Your Day Worth It?

Time to read: 59 seconds

One thing I do with my wild and precious life is buy and sell beautiful things, mostly jewelry.

Last week I promised to talk about being"well-used." Here's what I mean.

A well-used life isn't one where nothing goes to waste, where every hour is optimized and every talent monetized. That's maximizing, not meaning. And honestly, this form of well-used is exhausting. (Believe me, I know.)

Being well-used means your days are in service of something that matters. Your effort, attention, and particular mix of skills and quirks are spent on things worth spending them on. Who measures that worth? YOU!

Some days that looks like showing up fully for someone who needs you. Other days it's the quiet satisfaction of work done carefully. In my world it's a coaching session where someone has an ah-ha, a team functions more effectively, connecting a beautiful 1950s necklace to its new person, or a conversation with my young adult children where they actually hear me. :-) Well-used is rarely dramatic. It is showing up, again, for the thing you've already decided matters.

When you drop into bed tonight, ask yourself: what did I spend myself on today? Was it worth it?

More on how to actually answer that question next week.

Week 2: How Will You LIVE?

Time to read: 46 seconds

1920s Camphor Glass Necklace. Think flappers and speakeasies. Yes, it's for sale.

This summer, I am talking about creating life…your life. In a complex and chaotic world, you are still the creator of your days, weeks, and years.

Last week, I talked about how the world you want to live in starts with you. Today, I'm taking that a step further. Fair warning: my father's death has made me philosophical. :-)

Death is certain. None of us will escape it. So, it behooves you to decide how you want to LIVE.

You have "one wild and precious life" (to quote Mary Oliver), and I think each of us gets to, actually, have a duty to, live well. How you define "live well" is based on your values, interests, and life situation.

Living well doesn't mean that everything is great all the time, that you always get what you want, or that life is always easy. It means finding your way through complexity with integrity, looking for slivers of joy and beauty, finding the good in people and situations, and feeling most days like you were well used.

Being "well-used" is next week's topic. Stay tuned.

Should You Work In Your Passion?

Time to read: 1 min, 3 seconds

People tell me, "I want to work in my passion," or "I'm not passionate about my current job."

Oh dear. Finding your passion and working in it for the rest of your life is a lot of pressure.

Young professionals feel like they must find their passion and then turn it into work. My opinion? Passion is bunk.

That said, everyone has passions…many, many of them. Those are the things you enjoy, get lost doing, and love to think and talk about. A friend of mine likes to say, "You might have a passion for kitten snuggling, and that isn't going to make a career." I have a passion for making charm bracelets, and that isn't going to pay college tuition.

It's high pressure to expect to feel passionate about your job. Some people do. Others love their job and don't feel passionate about it. Still others enjoy their job well enough and satisfy their passions outside work.

It's ok for a job to simply be a job, something that supports your life and works in total.

Relieve yourself of the pressure to work in your passion. That's a recipe for being dissatisfied with what is, and maybe what is looks pretty great once you release that pressure value.

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I hope this helps!