How Are You Coping?

Time to read: 2 minutes if you read both PSes.

Yup - I've seen all these seasons of the Bachelor(ette)

Yup - I've seen all these seasons of the Bachelor(ette)

You don't need me to remind you of all the ways that things are stressful right now. Some days, the stress is so all-encompassing that it's hard to face the day. We are in survival mode - quite literally - and when in survival mode, you figure out how to cope.

Some coping is good.

Some coping is bad.

What are good and bad strategies, you may ask?

I have the most frustrating coach-y sort of answer...

It depends.

We can probably agree that violence against others is a bad coping strategy and finding homes for kittens is good. What about all the others like wine? TV? Cake? Work?

The answer goes back to last week's newsletter - know thyself.

Let's take my favorite coping strategy. My 16-year-old and I are on our 12th season of The Bachelor(ette). That's a lot of group dates, rose ceremonies and interpersonal drama. If you had suggested a year ago that The Bachelor would feature heavily in my mental health, I would have laughed.

To stay sane these days, something mindless and absorbing is not only fun, it's crucial. You can't consume a steady diet of politics and coronavirus news and stay mentally healthy. Mental breaks are vital. As a mental vacation, The Bachelor = good coping.

If I start to disappear into stupid TV to the exclusion of daily activities or you start to use wine to numb the discomfort of these hard times or if overworking is masking your feelings, then we've crossed into bad coping. Only you can know where that line is (that's the "it depends" part).

A glass of wine, TV time, and productive work may be exactly what you need to survive these times. Then know when your excellent coping has crossed into disappearing, numbing and denial and pull yourself back.

The Corporate Rebel coaching group is the best kind of coping. Fantastic colleagues. Consistent support. A step-by-step process to get to know yourself so you can powerfully navigate this moment in history and come out the other side ready for what's next.

Clarity U, will start in October. This program opens once a year, and I'd love to chat with you about how Clarity U will support and grow where you are now and where you want to go.

Sign up here for a 30-minute chat.

We'll talk about what's going on for you, what you need, and whether Clarity U is a good next step for where you are headed. For any of you who have worked with me, you know this initial conversation is casual, fun and productive whether you decide to join or not.

Here are some words from last year's participants:

"Doing this work has been more valuable than a lifetime of therapy. (And a lot more fun.)" - E.G.

"The Clarity U program has helped me in ways I didn't realize were possible." - A.C.

"I am so glad I participated in this program, it has changed me in ways I never expected!" - A.R.

I can't wait to connect!

Christina

P.S. Want to talk about Clarity U? Choose a time here for us to talk about what's going on in your life and career and how Clarity U will help you use the next few months to build your capacity for what's next.

P.P.S. Here's more information. Let's talk!

Do you relate to any of these statements?

  • Life feels chaotic and uncertain, and you feel overwhelmed and depleted.
  • You make decisions from a place of fear instead of empowered choice, constantly second guessing yourself.
  • You’re simultaneously unproductive and working more than you ever have.
  • The ineffective patterns that have held you back for years have intensified, showing up in work dynamics and personal relationships.
  • You’re reaching for ways to get your life and work back in control and not sure how or what to do.

What's in it for you? Starting in October you will learn to...

  • Shake off negative patterns of thinking and behaving so you can stop holding yourself back. Your life will be easier and work more fulfilling during this stressful time and into the future.
  • Gracefully navigate uncertainty so you are confident in your ability to handle change and instability.
  • Ground yourself physically and spiritually to allow radical transformation so you can stand steady in the midst of chaos.
  • Wield your new, portable Toolbox of Skills so you're ready to take action, make choices, and be in control of your career and life.
  • Get clear about who you are and what you want, and bravely take action to make your goals real.
 

When Will Things Go Back To "Normal?"

Time to read: Less than one minute

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The short answer to the question is, it won't. "Normal" as we once knew it is never coming back. So in the face of upheaval, what is a Corporate Rebel to do?

Imagine these scenarios:

You don't like your boss. You complain about her and wake up every morning wishing you had a different boss.

or

You have a teen who doesn't talk to you about his life. You ask questions and dig for information but you never get any.

or

The company you work for has been acquired. The business is not doing well and your work days are chaotic. You hate it.

or

A viral pandemic is sweeping the planet and you are trying to work from home, maybe with little kids underfoot, worrying about your loved ones. You just want life to go back to "normal."

Each of these is an example of resistance. Resistance looks like this: wishing for something different and pushing to change things that never change. The energy of resistance puts tremendous stress on you and leaves you depleated.

So what is a rebel to do?

The answer is simple: Acceptance

Acceptance doesn't mean resignation. Accepting something means seeing the truth. It means understanding that something is what it is. Acceptance means getting honest about reality.

When you accept, you drop the fight. You free your energy. Once you accept things as they are, then you can find the path forward. Then you can find opportunity.

Acceptance in all things is one of my goals for 2020 and thank goodness as I've needed it a lot in the past few weeks.

Do this quick exercise: Consider a situation that makes you stressed... like... I don't know... being stuck at home trying to work while homeschooling your kids? Find one thing you can accept in the situation and truly, honestly accept it. Watch what happens.

Then email me and tell me all about it or post to the Corporate Rebel HQ. I love to hear from you.

I've been brainstorming how best to serve you during this challenging time and I'm working quickly on some free resources to help you be productive and calm while working from home.

Coming Soon! The Corporate Rebel's Unconventional Guide to Working from Home AND a Work from Home Challenge. Stay tuned!

The Corporate Rebel Daily, a free 30-minute check-in at 9:00 CT, has been tremendous. It's a positive start to your day and you are welcome to join anytime. Sign up once, join when you can.

With rebel love,

Christina

P.S. Love the Corporate Rebel? Invite your friends to join. They can join us here.

 

Want Instant Calm? Ask Just One Question

Time to read: Less than one minute

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The world as you know it has turned upside down.

I hear from clients that they are worried about keeping their jobs, stressed to see their 401ks dwindle, and sad about the state of the world. All of that while also trying to stay focused and homeschooling children.

Today I have one question to ask yourself when you start to spin. (Thank you to Eckhart Tolle for this question.)

First, pause for a minute.

Then ask: Is there a problem right now?

If there is no immediate problem, let the worry and stress go.

If there is a problem, address it.

I love this question for 2 primary reasons:

  1. It brings you immediately into the present moment which is the place to be to find calm and peace.
  2. It reminds you that you have everything you need to handle whatever happens next.

As a talented and experienced worrier, I know that my worry is a waste of energy. Most of the time, the things you worry about never come true and when bad things do happen, you will be ready to handle them.

Keep this question on speed dial then email me to tell me how it helps. You can also pop into our Facebook community Corporate Rebel HQ or join The Corporate Rebel Daily, a free 30-minute check-in at 9:00 CT, M-F to help you ground and be productive in your new normal. Sign up once, and join when you can. I'll be there every weekday waiting for you.

On the weekends, I'll be in bed.

With rebel love,

Christina