Are You Hijacked By BS?

Time to read: 1.5 minutes. 2.5 minutes if you read all the way to the signature.

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Hey Rebels!

It’s Anne!

I'm doing a dance of joy to be here with you today. Hooray!

When Christina and I held our Quiet the Noise Challenge this summer, YOU gave us feedback and WE listened.

You said, gee, I want to work on this Fact vs. Fiction thing. To help you with that, we're hosting another 60-minute webinar! The Corporate Rebel Truthfully U: Fact vs Fiction. If you already know you want to join us, sign up here.

If you want to dig deeper into what we mean by Fact vs Fiction, step into my life for a moment. You'll quickly see how the fiction hoodwinks your mind and sucks your energy.

On a quiet Saturday, I sat at my desk preparing for the Rethinking U Webinar. Computer straightened. Papers arranged logically. Pens, pencils perfectly lined up. Then the phone rang.

We have a landline (yes, an antique contraption with wires connected to other wires) and no caller ID so every call is a mystery guessing game. I can generally fake it, “Oh hey! How’s it going?” until I have enough voice recognition data to figure out the caller.

As I said, the phone rang...

Me: “Hello?”

Friend (let’s call her Gina): “Why are you still at home?”

Me: “Uh…” (brain churning…It’s Gina. Why am I not supposed to be at home? I like being at home.)

Gina: “You were supposed to pick me up ten minutes ago!”

Me: “Oh horsefeathers!” (She was right.)

Me again: “I can be there in twelve minutes.”

Gina: “No, I’ll just go.”

Me: “Oh. Okay.”

Gina: “Bye.”

I flew into action, changed into public-appropriate attire, and shot out of the garage. My brain went crazy. Gina will never forgive me. She’ll think I’m not reliable. I made us late. I let her down. She’ll hold a grudge and tell our friends that you cannot count on Anne for anything. Nope. Unreliable Anne.

I then devised an elaborate, heartfelt apology that basically held me personally responsible for all badness everywhere.

I arrived (late) to the gathering and, lo and behold, there was no steam coming out of Gina’s ears. When a side moment presented itself, I delivered my (truncated) apology and Gina said, “That’s okay. It happens to all of us.” Or something like that. The end. Do you do this to yourself?

Get out your dissecting tools. Dig around in the first couple paragraphs and look for the FACTS of what happened.

FACT #1: I forgot I had planned to pick up Gina.

FACT #2: I didn’t pick up Gina because of Fact #1.

FACT #3: Gina forgave me and still trusts me.

After that, it's all FICTION. Gina will never trust me again. She’ll turn all our mutual friends against me. Blah. Blah. Blah. You get the point. I created a friendship catastrophe that was all in my head and a waste of time.

Notice the energy I squandered. Do you do make stuff up and create catastrophe's in your head? Are you tired of wasting energy generating all kinds of negative gobbledeemuck? And for nothing?

Join us! (Small trumpet fanfare.) We’re doing another webinar: The Corporate Rebel Truthfully U on Monday October 7 at noon Central Time. Join us here.

It's worth the 60 minutes if you...

  • Can’t keep negative thoughts out of your brain, even when you want to think positively.
  • Compare yourself with others and come up short.
  • Search for hidden meaning behind interactions.
  • Spin and lie awake at night analyzing situations leaving you muddled and tired. Your friends are seriously tired of talking about it.

In 60 minutes you will...

  • Distinguish the Facts of a situation from the Fiction
  • Clear the clutter in your brain so you feel calm, energetic, and confident
  • Dive under the emotion and confusion so you can make clearer and faster decisions
  • Take action based on what’s actually true, rather than what you think is true, which will lead to better results

Join us. We can't wait to see you there!

Christina and Anne

P.S. Invite your friends! Their minds are full of fictions, too, and some of them may be about you. :-) They can join here.

 

The First Step To Get What You Want

Time to read: less than one little minute

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Earlier this summer, my children and I spent a week at my parents' house clearing the clutter and hosting a yard sale. Even while schlepping boxes and sorting the toys from my 1970s childhood (bye-bye Spirograph), I think of YOU.

The goal in clearing the clutter from my parents' home is to free them to enjoy the things they love and to ensure that the house remains one they can manage and stay in for a very long time.

What does my parents' yard sale have to do with you?

This...

The first step to move toward the future you want is to clear the clutter. In your life, the clutter might be old thoughts that no longer serve you. It might be saying adios to friends who don't make you feel good about yourself anymore. It may literally be about trashing projects you're never going to do or clearing off your desk so you can focus. All of this clutter clogs your mental and energetic pipes and makes it impossible to move forward.

You know the experience. You try a few tips you read online and even though things feel smoother for a few days, you revert right back to the doubt, fear, and inaction.

Here are three simple ways to clear clutter from your life in order to create space to move toward the things you want:

  1. Clear physical stuff. Clean out your closet. Get rid of actual stuff.
  2. Clear the mental stuff. Challenge the disempowering beliefs. Dump the doubts and negative thinking.
  3. Join the Corporate Rebel Quiet the Noise Challenge. My BFF, Anne, and I will spend 7 days cleaning out your pipes and getting you on the path to what you want. It's like a yard sale for your mind and soul. You can join us here.

Can't wait to spend more time with you!

With rebel love,

Christina

P.S. If your friends and family have clutter - mental, physical or otherwise, invite them to join you in the Corporate Rebel Quiet the Noise Challenge. They can join the fun here.

 

How To Get Stuff Done, Fast

Time to read: less than one minute because you have s*$% to do!

Imperfection at its finest.

Imperfection at its finest.

Hello rebels!

To say that the past couple of weeks have been slammed would be an understatement. See if any of this sounds familiar to you...

  • My children are off for the summer. Bye-bye routine. Hello daily unpredictability and chaos.
  • I have daily client calls and meetings and have to take some of them from my bedroom because of see #1.
  • We're taking a trip next week so everything has gotten crammed into this week.
  • My BFF and I are launching a project for y'all in August and spent yesterday shooting videos.
  • A volunteer job requires hours of emails and organizing.
  • There's always a dose of interpersonal drama that sucks time and energy when you work with other people.
  • Then there's just regular life: showering, walking the dog, making food, cleaning.

Can you relate?

In weeks like this, the name of the game is "get s#*$ done."

So, how do you get your s*@# done with quality, efficiency and speed?

Keep this one simple moto in mind:

Completion over perfection.

In shooting the videos, Anne and I stumbled over our words sometimes. Did we shoot each video 10 times to get it perfect? NO! We declared our stumbling charming and human and moved to the next video.

I usually have this newsletter written by Tuesday afternoon. Here it is, Thursday morning, and I'm slamming it out before my children wake up. Am I beating myself up for not making my internal deadline or considering letting it go this once? NO. I woke up, chose a topic, and started writing.

Be thoughtful. Do good work. Meet your deadlines (or communicate well if you won't). Don't spend hours dotting every "i" and crossing every "t." Your 80% is good enough. Otherwise, perfection will make you insane. We're not fans of insanity here at the Corporate Rebel.

Get 'er done and move on.

I hope this helps.

Christina

P.S. Do you know someone who gets stuck in perfection and doesn't complete stuff efficiently, or at all? Share this article with them and they can sign up to join us here.

 

I Can't Stop Talking About Decision Making!

Time to read: 1:12.56 min

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Hi Rebels!

Friends and clients are making big decisions this spring. I can't stop talking about decision-making, because it's a place where you can make your life so much easier. I'm going to share with you another nuance for efficient and effective decision-making, because as I witness the various processes, I'm reminded of one thing.

Life wasn't meant to be this hard.

I wrote a few weeks ago about gathering information and feeling your feelings. (If you want the full set of hot tips about decision-making, you can get them here.)

Today, I want to show you how to tune your antenna to open versus closed energy.

Have you ever experienced something like this?

You walk into an interview and things feel off. You don't connect with the interviewers. You don't like the building. Do you take the job or not?

You visit a house in a great neighborhood. The price is right. The location is good. It's new and pretty, and a good investment. Something feels funny. Logic says you should buy it. Should you?

In each of these situations, you are probably tempted to decide using your smart brain and logic. You are strong and can make anything work by motoring through.

OMG. No!

Stop the madness.

The truth is, you have an astute antenna for picking up energy. When something feels hard and stagnant, it might be that it isn't meant to be or you're stepping over something important. If you look back over times when you pushed past your antenna, you will probably see intolerable jobs, costly mistakes, and time wasted.

Let's relook at the situations above through the lens of energy and ease:

If you are making a choice like a job or getting a dog, feel into whether the options feel open or closed. Is the energy moving forward or feeling like a closed door? If the energy feels constricted, stale or random, don't take that job or get that dog. Go where the energy feels open and flowing, even if logically it seems like you should take that job.

Logic isn't the only driver in a decision. With something like a house, visit it again and ask yourself, "Is this my house?" Give the decision time. Then, be honest with yourself, even if your choice sounds illogical to your brain.

Your decisions will become much easier when you are honest with yourself about the energy in your options. You've got sharp antenna. Use them. Pay attention.

I hope this helps.

Christina

P.S. Are your friends and colleagues struggling with decisions like mine are? Help them out by forwarding this email to them. They can join us here.

 

Struggle vs. Ease... Which Do You Choose?

Time to read: 1 minute, 35 seconds

Let's all move into Hotel Ease!

Let's all move into Hotel Ease!

Hi Rebels!

This week, I had a fun email exchange with one of your sister rebels who asked me about the time it takes to write these newsletters. She writes a blog and said it sometimes takes her 10-12 hours to produce a blog post and that "writing is hard work." That got me thinking about all the things you do every day that feel like "hard work."

I had to really think about that before I replied.

  1. Because I wanted to say something useful.
  2. Because over the years, I have developed a very different relationship with writing and work.

For years, I was mired in a story that work was hard and required struggle. Think: No pain, no gain.

To produce a dissertation, I became unreliable to my friends, unavailable to my partner, and worked many, many hours because I believed "hard work" was the only thing that would get me that darn PhD.

In my corporate job, I believed that long hours and "hard" work made me successful and got me recognized as a top performer. Toward the end of my time at my corporate job, I was working late at night, struggling to keep up with email, and working "hard" while sacrificing time with my family and frankly, my sanity.

The truth is... this "hard" work got me a PhD and did get me recognized as a top performer. And, there were huge costs associated with my choice to see work as "hard" and as a "struggle."

A couple of years ago, I decided to change my perspective toward work, and it has made all the difference. Here's what I said (among other things, like it takes me 20-30 minutes to write a newsletter) in the email exchange. I share this because I'd love for you to be able to shift from "hard" to "ease."

"I hold writing these newsletters (like I hold most things) as fun and easy. It’s part of my personal practices to let go of struggle so I practice ease (not struggle) with things like my newsletter. Holding it with ease liberates the process to take less time and actually be easeful. Sometimes, I don’t have a clue as to what to write, and then it takes a little longer."

Think about a place in your life where you believe "hard work" and struggle are the key to your success. Where can you breathe ease into the process. (Notice, I'm not saying "easy." Even ease has elements of challenge. The question is, what would it be like to drop the struggle and do the same work with ease?)

Give it a try then write and tell me all about it. I love hearing from you.

With rebel love,

Christina

P.S. If you love this newsletter, please share it with your friends and colleagues. The more, the merrier. Just forward it to them. They can join us here.

 

Process Versus Outcome. Which Is It?

Time to read: Less than one minute.

The long-awaited package

The long-awaited package

Hello rebels!

Have you had the experience of letting go of something you want and then once you let it go, you miraculously get it?

Here's what I mean:

This is the letting go part: When my family was in Kenya last year, we shipped a box of gifts to ourselves. The promise was that the package would arrive in 3 months. (Give or take a few months. I know how slow international shipping can be.) Three months passed. No package. Six months. Nothing. One year. Nada. This week, I told my husband that it was time to give up. If it arrived, it would be a miracle. We let go of the package ever arriving.

This is the getting part: I've been out of town doing team building and coaching with a client team and last night, my husband sent me a text that said, "guess what just arrived!"

Our package.

I was telling my client this little miracle story this morning, and she said, "See, that shows that you have to let go of the outcome."

Yup. She's right.

Here's the nugget: Pay attention to the process. In our story, we dropped any remaining expectation that the package would arrive. We didn't allow any stress over lost shipping costs. We remembered the gifts we were given with fondness and felt the love from the giver even if we didn't actually have the gifts.

When you detach yourself from the outcome (e.g. a promotion, a raise, an office with a window, a particular job) and instead focus on building great relationships, enjoying your day-to-day, and doing great work, the outcomes will take care of themselves.

And you never know, you might even get something better.

With rebel love,

Christina

P.S. You're the best!

 

Circumstances Don't Equal Happiness. Lessons From the Volcano.

Time to read: Another one clocks in at 1.5 minutes. I'm on a roll!

Lava photo courtesy of Bruce Omori

Lava photo courtesy of Bruce Omori

I was listening to a radio report about the volcano eruption in Hawaii. First, let me say that my heart goes out to the many people who have lost homes and farms. The destruction is devastating.

As I was listening to the report, I was struck by one particular story.

A retired school teacher (let's call her Sally) reported feeling heat under her home and receiving an "evacuate immediately" notice from the emergency response team. Sally grabbed her two dogs and a bag of dog food and left thinking she would come back in the morning to retrieve her laptop and other important possessions.

When Sally went back the next morning, her entire home was covered in a wall of lava. All her worldly possessions were gone. I expected tears. I expected anger. She explained her circumstances something like this, "When you choose to live in a volcanically active place, you take the risk of this happening. It's a good thing I do a lot of yoga. I have insurance and instead of staying here, I'm going to use this as an excuse to move closer to my children in California." She even laughed. Wow.

As the story ended, I realized this woman gave me (and you) a tremendous gift. She serves as a reminder that your circumstances do not dictate your level of contentment or happiness. I'll break down the lessons:

  • Life is a choice. Sally chose to live in Hawaii and therefore chose the risk. You choose to go to your job every day, whether you love it or hate it. You choose where you live. You choose who you spend your time with.
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  • Your reactions are a choice. It would be pretty natural for Sally to be devastated and angry. Instead she was optimistic and cheerful. Even in the midst of grief and loss, you can choose to fill your reaction with blame or with the pure experience of your human emotions including grief and anger.
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  • Take care of yourself. Sally does yoga. Taking care of your mind and body enables you to be resilient when things go awry, in little daily ways or in big ways like a lava wall.
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  • Look for the opportunity. When stuff happens, even bad stuff, you are being pointed to learn something, change something, or pivot in some way. Listen for the pivot. Where are you being pointed? Sally is planning to use this significant upset to make a move. (And you don't have to rush to the lesson. Have your emotions first, let things settle, then pivot as needed.)
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  • Focus on what's important. Sally grabbed her dogs. Hard circumstances are clarifying and point you swiftly and with precision toward what is important and what is not.
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  • Guard your sense of humor. Sally was laughing at her belief that she would return the following morning. She laughed that she saved a bag of dog food rather than her expensive new laptop. This is not to say that you must laugh or always look for the silver lining in tragedy. Levity, though, enables you to carry hard things lightly.

You are never as stuck as you sometimes believe you are.

With rebel freedom,

Christina

P.S. If you love the Corporate Rebel Unplugged Video Podcast and Newsletter, please share it with your friends and colleagues. They aren't stuck either. They can join us here.