One Word That Will Bring You Peace And Calm

Time to read: 42 seconds

Life and work change. You have a period of stability then things change again. Every day, I hear from people about layoffs, new babies, new bosses, retirement, sudden illness, reorganizations, and of course the stress of everything happening in our world right now.

I've thought a lot recently about what brings peace and calm. The best answer I've found is one word:

Complexity

When you grip the status quo ("But I loved my old boss") or cling to the one way something must be ("I am someone who works. No way I'm retiring.") you stay stuck, limit your options, and find yourself standing rigidly in one corner, certain that you're right.

The irony is that holding complexity helps you loosen your grip, and find ease in curiosity and understanding. Peace comes from being able to see how two contradictory things can be true at the same time.

When you can see that, all kinds of new possibilities open up.

Happy fall!

Ready For A Change?

Time to read: 1 minute, 46 seconds

When Deana called me, she loved her job as the Executive Director of Business Operations for a big company in a big city. Then the pandemic hit in the middle of her Clarity U cohort, and change came fast and furious. Work from home. The possibility of an early retirement. Maybe even a move.

Deana wrestled with these decisions. Retiring from her job...moving to a new city…what did that mean for her financially? What did it mean for her identity? Thanks to the tools she learned in Clarity U, Deana retired with style and picked up stakes and moved to a new home in her dream city.

Deana says,

"I would say Clarity U helped me sort through all the old patterns, voices and stories that were getting in my way. The program was chock full of tools, concepts, methods, and approaches facilitated by a strong, intuitive, and caring coach and undergirded with peer support, feedback, and encouragement. From my new home in Santa Fe, I am filled with gratitude for the tools and people who helped me get here."

If you want a slice of what Deana found, I'd love to talk!

I've opened my calendar to connect with you 1:1. Choose a time here . We'll talk through what's going on in your world, find a solution or two and explore if Clarity U is a good fit for you.

Clarity U starts on November 16 so the window to chat with me will close soon.

I look forward to talking with you!

Do You Feel Free Or Like A Hostage?

Time to read: So short and so relevant

FREE!

When you look around your career, do you feel free or do you feel like a hostage? As you assess this question, here are some hints:

Hostage:

• Your happiness and fulfillment are tied to (fill in the blank), your compensation, performance appraisal, raise, promotions, kudos from your boss. If you feel like you're constantly chasing the cookie, then you're trapped on a hamster wheel you feel you can't stop.
• You constantly think about making a change but never do.
• You feel like the risks of change (quitting your job, changing your perspective, seeing a therapist or coach) are more terrifying than putting up with the way things are.
• You wrestle with the same stress, decision point, or situation on repeat.

Free:

• You enjoy what you do (most days) and feel like you make a difference, to your coworkers, company, those you serve.
• You know that no matter the circumstances, you choose every day to be wherever you are.
• You feel like your work uses the best parts of you. You may be exhausted sometimes, and it's the "well used" kind of exhausted.
• Your work supports and balances well with the other parts of your life...family, free time, hobbies, health, rest.
• The balance of your life feels right to you. Even if that means you work 80 hours a week or you have all the free time in the world.

What I want for each of you is to feel free. Free doesn't mean nothing but free time or no work. It means that you feel like you have agency to craft your days through the lens of your priorities, style, and desires.

This summer, this newsletter is going to be a short and easy weekly challenge to help you feel more free. You don't have to sign up. You already are.

Invite your friends. They can join the summer challenge by signing up for my newsletter here.

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The Power of Changing Your Focus

Time to read: 56 seconds

Change Your Focus

I spent last week working at a spa in Mexico called Rancho La Puerta. (If you've been to The Ranch, email me!) I love teaching coaching classes, hiking, eating vegetables, sleeping, hip-hop dancing and doing sound healing.

I arrived depleted. Exhausted. Anxious. (Can you relate?)

I left hopeful. Calm. Renewed. (You can have this, too without crossing a border or buying anything.)

How can you duplicate this transformation from the comfort of your couch and neighborhood?

Here's what you do: Change what you pay attention to. Decide what you want to make real in your life. What do you talk about? What do you notice? What do you think about? What do you do with your time?

If the answer to those questions is worry, read news, and check items off your to-do list…well…how do those things affect your inner landscape? For many of you, those things equal stress.

Changing your focus is easy:

• talk about something you love
• spend time in an interesting conversation
• take your headphones out and listen to the birds on your dog walk
• cook tasty food
• call an old friend
• find what's right in the people and situations in your life rather than what's wrong

You have more power than you realize to determine your daily experiences. Tune your awareness and suddenly, you'll see that a beautiful reality exists alongside the ugly one. The beautiful reality is just as real (and maybe more real) than the stressed-out one.

Be well and have a good weekend.

#1 Mistake When Making a Change

Time to read: 47 seconds.

There’s a lot of movement these days. Clients getting promoted. People changing companies. Relocations. New jobs. New apartments. When you make a change, you move from one thing to another (duh).

In change, I see people make the same mistake over and over.

You move on too quickly.

In your haste and excitement to get to The New Thing, you forget to close The Old Thing.

The consequences are The Old Thing becomes sticky. It follows you. It clogs your energy. Think of people you hear still complaining about a job, apartment, or relationship they left years ago. Think of a job or relationship that you can’t seem to shake. That’s what sticky looks like.

Leave The Old Thing behind by doing these two simple things:

• Don’t leave before you’re gone. You mentally leave before you are actually gone. Stay present until you actually leave so you can enjoy your final days or feel your sad feelings.
• End well. Say good-bye to the people. Walk around the empty apartment. Share memories. Write notes. Say farewell to your cube. Mark the end with a short ritual or acknowledgement. It doesn’t have to be elaborate. Do be conscious that “this moment is the end.”

When you allow yourself a good ending, you become more open and ready for the new beginning.

Enjoy your New Thing! (And write to tell me all about it. I love your stories.)

5 Ways to Be an Awesome Newbie!

Time to read: Just under one little minute. You have errands to run!

Now this is new: S'mores ice-cream cone with GLITTER!

OMG. Has summer already ended? If you have kids starting school and even if you don't, can you feel that fall, back-to-school energy? Things feel more serious. Like we're all settling in and getting back to a routine.

My kids started a new school on Monday. They know no one and believe me, this Corporate Rebel Mama's heart has been very tender this week. We have lots of rebels starting new ventures like new jobs (hey Rick!) or living in new locations (shout out to you, Audrey!) or experimenting with new ways to do old jobs (Dean!).

There is newness in the air!

New possibilities.

A new start. (Even if you're in the same job, in the same company.)

A new year.

As we get to know the new community and routine at our new school, I'm noticing a few things that are helping me through these tender days. I share them with you as you embark on your new fall. Here are 5 ways to be new:

1. Have a sense of adventure. Rather than focusing on all the things you don't have or can't do, lean into the adventure of a new job, project or school with all the fascination, wonder, and curiosity you would bring to an international vacation.
2. Be humble. In our new school, I know very little about how things work. It's a steep learning curve and for a woman who is used to knowing everything that's going on, it's humbling to be at the beginning again. Stopping in humility every so often in your life is a very good thing. It's a great reset button to remind you to keep learning.
3. Be open. Be open to new relationships and experiences. You have no idea where an opportunity or new friend is going to come from.
4. Ask for help. Many times, you won't even have to ask. Help will just be available to you. In either case, be humble and take advantage of it.
5. Stay in your discomfort zone. It's ok to be uncomfortable. In fact, it's marvelous to be uncomfortable. In the discomfort, you stretch. You learn new things about yourself. You discover new opportunities. And it will pass. Believe me, I'm uncomfortable a lot these days.

So, welcome to fall, beautiful rebels. Feels like it's going to be a smashing year!

With rebel love,

Christina

P.S. As part of doing lots of new things this fall, I am going to be interviewed on the What's NEXT webcast with Jason Lauritsen. He's interviewing leaders who bring innovation and positive disruption to the workplace - like me! The webcast is September 5 at 1:00 ET. It will be recorded if you can't make the event live. Join here and invite your friends. They are welcome to join, too!

The only trick you need to do something hard

Estimated read time: between 1 and 2 minutes

Ahhh…corporate glory days. (Crazy hat day courtesy of the wonderful Michele Chin-Purcell.)

My clients are starting new jobs and expanding their opportunities and having brave conversations and doing things that are new to them. Some stuff feels hard for them, too. (And they're excited and moving forward and getting what they want).

That's why I'm writing this to you. I said there was one thing that will help you do hard things and as I'm writing, I realize there's a BONUS thing. (2 lessons for the price of one! Yay!)

Here's the one thing:

And it's funny because the lesson is this: do one thing. That's it. I learned this from my husband at 3:00 am after I'd been worrying about producing an Excel spreadsheet for a team of VPs in my new corporate job and OMG, I've never seen Excel before in my life! "All you have to do is go into the office tomorrow and do one thing." He said those words either because they are wise or because he thought they were his best chance of getting any sleep.

All you have to do is one thing. Then the next thing. Then the next until, amazingly, you've done all the things.

Here's the BONUS thing:

Hold onto why you are doing the hard thing. I'm producing a webinar because I care deeply about making sure that your freedom is never negotiable. You told me you:

• feel stuck
• want to get out of your own way
• lack opportunities
• want work/life balance
• are exhausted
• are worried that time is slipping by

I am delighted to keep testing the systems and producing content because I know the process I'm teaching next Wednesday will help you find the peace, balance, and opportunities you crave.

Christina