Your Holiday Toolkit #1: Make Things Easier!

Time to read: 58 seconds

For the next few newsletters, as the holidays approach like a speeding train, I am going to give you one tool a week designed to make your holiday easier, smoother, and more joyful.

Tool #1 Simplify

You are probably already gift shopping, menu planning, and either traveling or expecting guests. You might have office parties, friend gatherings, and time with family. The sheer volume of activity can be overwhelming, even if you love the holidays. If you have a family conflict or aren't a big fan of the holidays, the stress can be huge.

My strong recommendation: Simplify

Pick one aspect of the holidays that means a lot to you and simplify everything else. For me, I love the food. Planning, shopping, preparing and eating. However, I wrap gifts in newspapers and reusable cloth bags. I don't bother with fancy packaging.

If you have many priorities, how can you do less of each one? Maybe make 3 kinds of cookies instead of 10. Serve cheese instead of homemade snacks. Organize a potluck rather than do all the cooking yourself.

I've already heard many clients and friends say, "How am I going to get everything done before the holidays?" Look for every place you can simplify so you have more time for yourself and those you love.

Next week, I'll share how to know if you're doing too much and what else you can do about that.

Ho! Ho! Ho!

What To Do When You Feel Like You Can't Do Anything

Time to read: 1 second

My list of top line practices

Lately, I've talked with many clients about anxiety and exhaustion. It's year-end, and people are busy. Everyone is ready for a break.

Can you relate?

When you are overwhelmed, burned out, or you've gotten to the point where you can't imagine scheduling one.more.thing, here's what to do. (Credit for this idea goes to Liz Gilbert who was interviewed on Glennon Doyle's podcast, We Can Do Hard Things.)

Create a list of ten top-line behaviors you can turn to when you feel like you've got nothing left. This list is for low motivation. Sadness. Transition. Stress. Make a list of 10 things you know you can do easily.

Here are examples:

• organize your sock drawer
• meditate
• snuggle your dog
• knit
• read
• bake
• purge your pens of ones that don't work or ones you just don't like (I do this when I'm having trouble getting started on something)
• go for a walk
• call a friend

I keep my list on my phone and recommend that clients document their lists someplace easy to access. The whole point is you don't have to think about it. You simply look at the list and go. If you have to, you do the list for days until you find your mojo again.

I hope this helps.

One Word That Will Bring You Peace And Calm

Time to read: 42 seconds

Life and work change. You have a period of stability then things change again. Every day, I hear from people about layoffs, new babies, new bosses, retirement, sudden illness, reorganizations, and of course the stress of everything happening in our world right now.

I've thought a lot recently about what brings peace and calm. The best answer I've found is one word:

Complexity

When you grip the status quo ("But I loved my old boss") or cling to the one way something must be ("I am someone who works. No way I'm retiring.") you stay stuck, limit your options, and find yourself standing rigidly in one corner, certain that you're right.

The irony is that holding complexity helps you loosen your grip, and find ease in curiosity and understanding. Peace comes from being able to see how two contradictory things can be true at the same time.

When you can see that, all kinds of new possibilities open up.

Happy fall!

Ready For A Change?

Time to read: 1 minute, 46 seconds

When Deana called me, she loved her job as the Executive Director of Business Operations for a big company in a big city. Then the pandemic hit in the middle of her Clarity U cohort, and change came fast and furious. Work from home. The possibility of an early retirement. Maybe even a move.

Deana wrestled with these decisions. Retiring from her job...moving to a new city…what did that mean for her financially? What did it mean for her identity? Thanks to the tools she learned in Clarity U, Deana retired with style and picked up stakes and moved to a new home in her dream city.

Deana says,

"I would say Clarity U helped me sort through all the old patterns, voices and stories that were getting in my way. The program was chock full of tools, concepts, methods, and approaches facilitated by a strong, intuitive, and caring coach and undergirded with peer support, feedback, and encouragement. From my new home in Santa Fe, I am filled with gratitude for the tools and people who helped me get here."

If you want a slice of what Deana found, I'd love to talk!

I've opened my calendar to connect with you 1:1. Choose a time here . We'll talk through what's going on in your world, find a solution or two and explore if Clarity U is a good fit for you.

Clarity U starts on November 16 so the window to chat with me will close soon.

I look forward to talking with you!

How To Resolve Your Burnout

A vacation to Paris, although pretty great, isn't going to fix it.

One word for you. Burnout.

I hear about burnout a lot. Any of this ring true for you?

• Exhaustion
• Lack of motivation
• That sick feeling on Sunday afternoon
• Wondering if you need to quit or work at Target

A number of my clients have taken sabbaticals or in some cases, lengthly leaves which might end up lasting forever. Friends have resolved their burnout by quitting intense jobs to become baristas.

You think you can fix your burnout with a fruity drink under a beach umbrella? The thing is, when you return to work and life, all the conditions that led to your burnout are still there.

So it becomes a cycle.

Burnout, rest. Burnout, rest.

The exhaustion and lack of motivation never resolve.

Does this sound like you or someone you know?

Good news! I'm going to give you all my best tips and strategies for managing your energy at the live event, Energizing U. You'll be able to take what you learn into your life to change the conditions and resolve the exhaustion so you feel more energized and motivated in your work and life.

If you're not burned out, please come. What we're talking about has universal application wherever you are in life.

Energizing U is 11:00am - 12:00pm CT on Thursday October 26. If you want to amp up your energy and movtivation, this one's for you! Sign up here.

What I Learned This Summer Part 4: Trust the Magic

My dog wants me to work here

Today might be a little longer than usual as the story is so good. The point is to show you how to make the magic happen in your career.

Hint: Wait. Pay attention.

Here's the background of seemingly unrelated things that have been rolling around in my head for a couple of years:

• I live near a college and walk my dogs on campus everyday.
• I love the energy of early adulthood, and paid for my PhD by working in student affairs as a Residence Hall Director.
• My clients now include a number of 21-year-olds, and it's thrilling to teach them the lessons I wish I had known at their age.
• I have loosely thought about creating a program for young adults and have done nothing with that idea.
• I miss having colleagues that I see every day and the ambient conversations that happen in the cafeteria and hallway.

Here's the story:

My husband and I were walking on campus, and he suggested I might do a program for college students. I couldn't shut the conversation down fast enough. It was my restorative August, and I could not tolerate even a fun, inspirational conversation about work.

As we continued to walk, a door opened and hundreds of new students poured out. We pivoted our route to avoid the crowd and found ourselves walking next to a woman. I asked if she had just presented to the first years, and it turns out she is the VP of Student Affairs. We discovered we're neighbors, discussed her kids, our kids, and then I mentioned how much I loved my time in student affairs. Then she said, "Might you be interested in a part-time job?"

For the first time since I became a coach, I thought... "yeah, maybe."

We're having tea soon.

I don't know where this will lead or I want to add a part-time job to a full life, and here's my point. The magic happens when you least expect it. I wasn't just not looking, I actively shut down the conversation. Then one minute later, an opportunity fell out of nowhere.

So, let yourself long for things. Let ideas roll around in your head. Think about and even talk about unrelated interests. Then say hello, be out in the world, watch for the open door, and walk through with curiosity.

I'm amazed as you are.

My next live event, Energizing U, is coming up on October 26. If you want to amp up your energy and movtivation, this one's for you! Sign up here.

What I Learned This Summer Part 3: You'll Know When Its Time

Time to read: 36.25 seconds

Last week I told you I took the month of August off. The truth is I was bone tired. Not burned out because I love what I do, and after the pandemic and a bunch of personal stuff, I needed to put everything down and recover.

I was unmotivated. I slept until 8:30. Going to the gym was a victory. Major sources of entertainment were walking my dogs, hanging with friends, and reading. I could not muster the energy for anything related to work. I couldn't even talk about it. (You'll hear more about that next week.)

A little voice wondered if my drive would ever return. If my new normal would be nothing but dog walks and tea.

Then, in the past week, as I've started seeing clients again and planning for a new cohort of my signature group program, Clarity U (more coming about that later), I started to imagine a couple of free online events and what I wanted to write in my newsletter. Ideas started flowing, and I'm excited to create events and content for you.

The takeaway for you is that you can trust yourself to know when it's time to turn it off. And when you're ready to turn it back on. Your motivation and energy ebb and flow. Be ready to move when it flows, and honor your need for the ebb.

You can get more information and sign up for Creating U here and Energizing U here.