3 Easy Ways To Cultivate Joy

Time to read: 56 seconds

Like this little beauty!

I love having a mail bag of questions and topics from all y'all. A number of you asked me to focus on joy, especially when there are so many things to worry about. So, today I'll show you the easy path to joy.

Worry and stress are easy. You only have to read the news or pay attention to the constant changes in the workplace to find things to keep you awake.

Humans are designed with a negativity bias. Our evolutionary interest dictates that a rustling in the bushes prompts us to think, "tiger!" and run. If we approach those bushes with curiosity and openness, we likely get chowed and that's our evolutionary end.

The good news? You are not stuck with your negativity bias. Humans also have choice and intention. You can cultivate positivity and joy.

Here are three easy ways to cultivate joy:

      1. Look for it. Joy doesn't have to be huge gestures and momentous events. Find tiny moments. Sparkling snow. Delicious bread. A bird. Your first sip of coffee. You don't have to wait for vacation to find joy. It's around you right now, even people in Zoom calls say hilarious things or have a cool painting behind them.
      2. Appreciation. Take every opportunity to offer appreciation - to your family, co-workers, the barista, your child's teacher. Make it your business to be the one who sends the appreciative email or notices what someone has done.
      3. Gratitude. Do I dare go all cliche? Attitude of gratitude and all that. Gratitude matters. For real. Go to bed at night and wake up each morning thinking of one thing you're grateful for.

    Put these three practices together, and you will have more joy. Works every time!

    If you are one of the many people who forward these emails to your friends and colleagues, please make sure they know they sign up for this newsletter here

    Be well and have a good weekend.

 

Remove This Word And Change Your Life

Time to read: 1 minute, 15 seconds

I was talking with a client this week, and he said something like,"If I just control the information that goes out, things will go smoothly." Every time I hear this word I reply with, "let's make a tiiiiiny adjustment to one word."

The word is….

CONTROL

Boo. Hiss. Erase. Delete. Gone forever.

Control is an illusion. When you believe the illusion, control leads to inflexibility over possibility, outcome over process, reaction over responsibility, and separation over connection. Striving for control limits your view, feeds unhealthy competition, and is quite ineffective.

Instead of control, try one of these words: ownership, responsibility, influence, power.

Back to the example: What's different if you have ownership of the information that goes out? Or if you have influence over it? Ownership and influence give you power. They put you in the driver's seat. They recognize that you are responsible for your side of the fence and help you get clear about what's yours. Ownership and influence lift you from responsibility for what happens on the other side.

Deleting and replacing the word will help you, over time, delete and replace the energy of control and set you up to embrace the ease that brings.

Try it and then email me what happens!

I love to hear from you. Email me

 

The Corporate Rebel's Guide To Being Of Service

Time to read: 1 minute, 15 seconds

I finally had a few hours to pour over all the input you sent after the New Year. You asked me to talk about things from the existential (How do we trust our inner knowing?) to the tactical. (How do I know when a meeting needs to be in person vs virtual?)

I'm excited to dive in on the things you care about.

Today is about service. A few of you asked how you can make a difference when the world's problems seem so big. You're needed. Really. Here's what I mean:

I recently started substitute teaching at my children's school. Although I teach in my business, I'm not a trained teacher and a classroom full of students terrified me. After my teens schooled me in how not to be lame, I took my first assignment in the middle school. Turns out I like middle schoolers and that everything I've learned as a trainer and leader made me pretty good at engaging kids.

There's much need these days so here are my three criteria for service so you can look around your corner of the universe and decide where to plug yourself in:

  • What's in it for them? The main point of service is to actually meet a need and make things better. Knowing that you're making a difference, even to one person, motivates you. In my world, there aren't enough substitute teachers. The past two years have been rough on educators, and they need back up.
  • What's in it for you? When you meet a need for others and yourself, it's a win-win. Find service that benefits you or people you love or helps you develop a skill or a new perspective. I want school to stay open for my kids and all kids. I'm also an extrovert and am happier when I'm out in the world, live and in person. And I get a free lunch!
  • Can you do it? Use your skills and gifts. I wouldn't volunteer in technology or construction. I'm great with people, good on my feet and entertaining. Perfect for a class of 5th graders. I can also schedule my coaching to leave a few days open for subbing. Look for the openings in your schedule, even if it's just once or twice a month.

Today a 5th grader thanked me for being a good sub and a preteen told me she liked my dress. So worth it.

 

My Solution For Everything

Time to read: 1 minute, 15 seconds

When life presents you with a problem, the temptation is to do something - schedule the meeting, email the teacher, buy the product, make the phone call, have the conversation.

I'm a recovering over-doer, and I've discovered that there's a more effective path forward.

Do nothing.

This isn't a lazy, avoidance version of do-nothing. Instead, it's a powerful choice that enables life and work to flow smoothly. Often, the fast response is motivated by avoiding discomfort. When you learn to ride the discomfort and then act from a cleaner, clearer place, your action is easier, takes less energy, and yields more effective outcomes.

Here are my favorite strategies to help you powerfully do nothing:

  • Pause. Even if it's only for a few seconds. Pausing allows your brain to come back online and buys you time when you don't know what to do next or how to respond. It's ok to sit in silence.
  • Wait. This is a souped-up version of pause. When you wait, things shift over time. You get clear. Circumstances change. When I wait, the solution presents itself without any effort and is usually much easier than whatever I would have done if I charged into doing.
  • Meditate. Mediation takes doing nothing to a whole new level. Worried about Covid? Meditate. Kid failed a test? Meditate. Deciding to quit your job? Meditate. Meditation is my go-to answer for everything these days. You'll be amazed at the wisdom you find when you sit quietly for 15 minutes.

In October, I met a woman who works in emergency management. She has seen and planned for any terrible scenario you can Imagine. She said when it comes to emergencies people think the right mindset is,"Don't just stand there, DO something!" Experts, however, teach, "Don't just do something, STAND there!" Standing there, she explained, enables to you look around, assess the situation, and proceed intentionally.

Exactly.

Do nothing on the path to more intention.

I'd love to hear about your experiments with doing nothing. Email me and let me know.

 

2022 Predictions

Time to read: 12 seconds.

Ahhh….2022

Welcome to 2022 wonderful Corporate Rebels!

Thank you for your responses to my request for input. I am digesting your thoughts and questions. You will soon see those in this weekly newsletter.

For today, I want to give you my predictions for 2022. (Yes, I have a crystal ball, and it shows the future.)

  1. Make peace with reality. Covid isn't going anywhere. Separation and division continues. Chaos and disruption in the world does not mean that you have to live in despair and frustration. Accept the situation. Drop resistance. When you accept where you (and we) are as it is, new possibilities open.  
  2. See possibilities. I laugh at my innocence in believing things would snap back to 2019 eventually. There is no going back, and the best choice is to keep going. I'm optimistic about the future. In my work I see healing, creativity and people stepping in to help. Pay attention to what is working. You'll be amazed by what you see and the possibilities in your work and life.  
  3. Be empowered. The power dynamic between employers and employees has shifted. During the pandemic, people felt the importance of their labor, time, and talent. Employees are no longer willing to work crazy hours and burn out their bodies and minds. I see people from cleaning staff to corporate directors taking back their power at work. Now is a good time to ask for what you want.  
  4. Be flexible. We're still in for a bumpy ride. In person at the office? Ha. Maybe. Maybe not. Online school? Goodness, I hope not. Covid rules? Who knows. Have grace for yourself and for the leaders and service providers you interact with. Assume positive intent and stay flexible with changes and interruptions. You'll be happier when you can easily pivot.

That's what I see for 2022. More coming soon.

 

Will You Do Me A Quick Favor?

Time to read: 12 seconds. Time to answer the questions 10-15 minutes.

It's the first week of 2022. Last year we were in lockdown.

And this year?

You are back at the office. Or you're not. You had fulfilling in-person holidays with your family. Or not. You have new energy and are ready to go this year. Or not.

I'd love to know how you're doing and what you're thinking. My goal in these newsletters and in the live events and courses I offer is to make a difference in your life and work. There's been so much change. I'm wondering, where are you now?

Will you shoot me an email and answer these three questions?

  • 1. How do you feel these days?
  • 2. What do you see ahead of you in 2022?
  • 3. If you followed a terrific executive coach and she was super helpful to you in 2022, what would she talk about? What would she do?
I love to hear from you. Welcome to 2022!