Remove This Word And Change Your Life

Time to read: 1 minute, 15 seconds

I was talking with a client this week, and he said something like,"If I just control the information that goes out, things will go smoothly." Every time I hear this word I reply with, "let's make a tiiiiiny adjustment to one word."

The word is….

CONTROL

Boo. Hiss. Erase. Delete. Gone forever.

Control is an illusion. When you believe the illusion, control leads to inflexibility over possibility, outcome over process, reaction over responsibility, and separation over connection. Striving for control limits your view, feeds unhealthy competition, and is quite ineffective.

Instead of control, try one of these words: ownership, responsibility, influence, power.

Back to the example: What's different if you have ownership of the information that goes out? Or if you have influence over it? Ownership and influence give you power. They put you in the driver's seat. They recognize that you are responsible for your side of the fence and help you get clear about what's yours. Ownership and influence lift you from responsibility for what happens on the other side.

Deleting and replacing the word will help you, over time, delete and replace the energy of control and set you up to embrace the ease that brings.

Try it and then email me what happens!

I love to hear from you. Email me

My Solution For Everything

Time to read: 1 minute, 15 seconds

When life presents you with a problem, the temptation is to do something - schedule the meeting, email the teacher, buy the product, make the phone call, have the conversation.

I'm a recovering over-doer, and I've discovered that there's a more effective path forward.

Do nothing.

This isn't a lazy, avoidance version of do-nothing. Instead, it's a powerful choice that enables life and work to flow smoothly. Often, the fast response is motivated by avoiding discomfort. When you learn to ride the discomfort and then act from a cleaner, clearer place, your action is easier, takes less energy, and yields more effective outcomes.

Here are my favorite strategies to help you powerfully do nothing:

• Pause. Even if it's only for a few seconds. Pausing allows your brain to come back online and buys you time when you don't know what to do next or how to respond. It's ok to sit in silence.
• Wait. This is a souped-up version of pause. When you wait, things shift over time. You get clear. Circumstances change. When I wait, the solution presents itself without any effort and is usually much easier than whatever I would have done if I charged into doing.
• Meditate. Mediation takes doing nothing to a whole new level. Worried about Covid? Meditate. Kid failed a test? Meditate. Deciding to quit your job? Meditate. Meditation is my go-to answer for everything these days. You'll be amazed at the wisdom you find when you sit quietly for 15 minutes.

In October, I met a woman who works in emergency management. She has seen and planned for any terrible scenario you can Imagine. She said when it comes to emergencies people think the right mindset is,"Don't just stand there, DO something!" Experts, however, teach, "Don't just do something, STAND there!" Standing there, she explained, enables to you look around, assess the situation, and proceed intentionally.

Exactly.

Do nothing on the path to more intention.

I'd love to hear about your experiments with doing nothing. Email me and let me know.

5 things I want you to know in these tough times

I've struggled with what to write this week. The news has been like drinking from a political firehose. It's hard to keep up.

I wanted to find a brilliant answer for you. A salve that would solve the pain in the world. I haven't found the shiny solution yet. If you spot it, will you let me know?

That said, I have uncovered some truths about Corporate Rebels that I'd like to share. My hope is that they give you hope.

1. Corporate Rebels understand that uncertainty is the only certainty. If you don't know where to put your attention or what to do in the current climate, you are not alone. You don't have to know your final destination in order to take action. (Just like your career.)
2. Corporate Rebels know that change is inevitable, and hard. We are in the midst of significant change. If you have lived through an acquisition, a divorce, or a relocation, you know that change is disruptive and anxiety-producing, even if it's change you wanted.
3. Corporate Rebels are complex thinkers. You see beyond either/or and us/them. You can hold complexity, even things you disagree with, in service of a larger vision. It is going to take creativity and innovation to navigate the divisiveness and pain. We need unique voices right now. Like yours.
4. Corporate Rebels know that how you show up is as important as what you do. Staying silent on important issues at work keeps people unhappy in their jobs. With everything that's going on in the world, it's important not to sit quietly on the sidelines. Some people will march (see the peace dove my children, husband, and I marched under in St. Paul), some write letters, others reach out with compassion to their Muslim neighbors, some pray. Do what you do best. Write. Bake. Reach out. Show up at work with kindness and love. You have tremendous power to make a difference with your gifts from where you are right now.
5. Corporate Rebels know that self care if crucial. In order to be involved in your community, to do your job well, to show up for your family, and to navigate the work that needs to be done, you have to take care of yourself. Maintaining your inner peace and health will ensure peace and health in your outer world, too.

As has been said many times, we're in uncharted waters. It would be lovely if there was a simple solution and a best action. There isn't. And, you have tremendous power to be what you wish to see in the world. Go be that.

With deep respect and love,

Christina