What To Do With Your Discomfort?

Time to read: 1 min, 1 second or 61 seconds

Feeling anxious and unnerved in the uncertainty? You are not alone.

Last week we talked about walking through the uncertainty surrounded by your people.

This week, when things are uncertain, painful, or uncomfortable, your only option is KEEP GOING.

We make up that it's "bad," or "not ok" to feel uncomfortable which leads you to try to remove the discomfort. People turn to alcohol, shopping, drugs, work, and all sorts of other addictions and distractions to try to feel "ok."

That is not to say that a glass of wine or an evening of Netflix is wrong. (Wait until next week to find out more about that.)

Instead, though, see if you can simply be uncomfortable and let the discomfort be ok. Discomfort doesn't have to derail you from life and work. It can simply be a temporary condition that you live with for a while until a decision is made, a situation is resolved, or the election is over.

Once on the other side, you can start to find yourself and your equilibrium in the new space.

Does that make sense? Please reach out if it doesn't. Or if it does and you have more to say!

If you have friends who are anxious and uncomfortable please point them here. They can subscribe and join the conversation! Sign up here.

Give Yourself Permission

Time to read: 46.5 seconds

If you need uplifting, today isn't it.

Today is about the permission to feel however you are feeling.

Here's me: I'm weary.

I got Covid in NYC. (I'm fine.) Everyone in my family and many of my friends either have Covid now or had it recently. Then there's Ukraine, and Buffalo. And Uvalde.

I'm tired of bad news. I'm tired of children getting killed. I'm tired of black people being killed. I'm tired of Asian people being killed. Frankly, I'm tired of all kinds of people getting killed. I'm tired of wearing a mask. I'm tired of trying to keep my parents safe. I'm tired of figuring out every day how to pull two teenagers through this world with hope and optimism.

I am fundamentally optimistic. I am grateful for many things (although today I'm just not feeling it, ya know?). I know that this will pass, and I'll be my cheery self again in no time.

And sometimes, my job as a coach is to model the full range of human experience and emotion so you have permission to have your full range of human experience and emotion.

Today, I'm weary.

I called a friend and she said, "welcome to Blue Island." If you're weary, too, or just not feeling it, pull up a beach chair. Blue Island a hopping place with free drinks. If you're feeling great…well….great! Free drinks for you, too.

Here's the message for today. If you are also feeling blue…or if you feel blue tomorrow or in a week…it's ok. You can simply feel blue and keep going. It's normal. Even desirable. The world is worth your weariness, sadness, even your despair.

If you know someone who needs permission to feel down, share my newsletter with them! Anyone can sign up here.

What To Do When You Feel Helpless

Time to read: Today is short. There's a lot going on.

This week my clients and my own children are asking a question something like, "How do I keep going when the world sucks?"

I'm not a geo-political or historical expert, and this week's invasion of Ukraine must not go unmentioned. Russia's brutal invasion of Ukraine is painful to witness. I hear the helplessness. The fear that the bad guys win. The recognition of pure cruelty. It's hard to comprehend. It's hard to know what to do.

Keep 2 important things in mind:

1. Feel your feelings. Open your heart. Don't ignore what's happening and let yourself be heartbroken. Be human. This situation is worthy of your tears, anger, and despair.
2. You have to keep going. You have important work to do. You have important people to love. You have a difference to make in your corner of the world. Bring treats for your co-workers (if you see them in person). Call an old friend. Write a love letter. Volunteer to serve meals. You matter. Your work matters. The only way to counter bullies is to not give in. The Ukrainian people are showing that resolve. Help those around you keep going. They matter, too.

   I'll say it again. You matter. Your work matters. Keep going.

   And hope and pray for peace.