Do This. It Makes Everything Better.

Time to read: 15 seconds

My daughter recently told me that I have no "chill." I prefer to think of myself as energetic and productive. And, she has a point.

Where are you on the scale of chill to energetic?

Regardless of where you are on the scale, I have something for you to try, something highly scientific and skilled that will take weeks to master.

Ready?

Here it is.

Lie down.

That's it. Simply lie down. The couch is a pretty good place although I can also recommend the floor. Rather wonderful things happen including rest, meditation, reading, dog love, and a cat on your stomach. Oh, and you become more productive when you take a break, Who knew?!

I feel like I've discovered something under-rated among the type-As and kept highly secret among those of you with "chill." Your secret is out, and it's marvelous.

Be well. Now you know what to do with your weekend. Have fun!

Working Too Much?

Time to read: 1 minute, 4 seconds

Hey Rebels,

Today is "help, I'm working too much but not as productive" day.

You face an uncertain future. The situation changes week-to-week, sometimes day-to-day under Covid-19. Some of the stress is global, and some is specific to your industry, workplace or family situation.

Uncertainty breeds stress, and stress breeds over-performing. (It also breeds under-performing, which is the subject for next week.)

Do these symptoms of over-performing feel familiar?

• Working constantly
• Not taking time for fun and joy
• Believing that if you work just a little more, you'll fix it, solve it, or find the answer
• Trying to look good to your superiors or colleagues
• Feeling exhausted
• Working a lot, but not feeling productive

"Hello, my name is Christina. I'm an over-performer." Let me rephrase that, thanks to 9 years of intensive personal and professional development I am a recovering over-performer so I have a few thoughts about what to do. In a nutshell, here's what I've learned:

• Recognize when you have crossed the line from productive and effective to over-performing. (Hint: You feel like your self-worth is wrapped up in your work. You start to feel resentful and exhausted. You are focused on looking good rather than being creative and serving.)


• Create structures to support breaks. Shut down your computer. Turn off your phone. Go out of town for the weekend and don't take your laptop. Chronic over-performers have to be forced to slow down and rest.


• Get clear about the difference between what's truly important in your work and the busy-work that makes you feel productive, but actually isn't. Do important work. Let the busy-work go.


• Unhook your sense of self-worth from your job. You are not single-handedly going to solve all the world's problems as much as you might like to. You are not a failure if you haven't yet stopped world hunger or systemic racism. Trust that you always know the next right step and that your future and career will unfold in the way it is supposed to.

Over-performing holds you back from doing the work you are meant to do as you get stuck in exhaustion and self-doubt. We need you. We need you to feel worthy and free so you can get about the important work of making the world the place you want it to be.

I hope that helps. Next week is for all you under-performers. Motivation, anyone?

Are You Bored?

Time to read: 50 seconds of pure excitement!

I called a friend of mine a few minutes ago. "I'm bored," I told her (despite a long to-do list). After she observed that boredom is an unusual state of being for me, she suggested I take my dog for a walk and let my brain be still.

Stillness... also an unusual state of being for me.

I tried it and am happy to report that although I still feel bored, I am moving forward. Do you know what to do when you feel bored?

Boredom is a transitional emotion. It can either take you up into optimism, joy, and contentment or down into frustration, self-judgment, and despair. You have a choice.

Here are your options:

To go down: Judge your boredom. Judge yourself for being bored. You have a long to-do list and a great life. How could you possibly be bored? Decide there is something wrong with you for being bored. You've just gotten on the fast train down. Expect to spend a good amount of time down there.

To go up: Pause and notice the normal human experience of being bored. Take a break. Simply be bored. If you're at home, watch TV (without judgment). If you're at work, take a walk or strike up a conversation. Decide on one thing you can do (clean out your email, practice a speech, make a phone call). Doing the one thing might start the engine for more things. Or it might not. Get motivated or stump along. Either is fine. Some days are like this, and it will pass.

I practiced my story for the Moth, which got my blood pumping with fear and excitement. (Remember that commitment? I'll be at the Story Slam on May 22nd.) Now I'm writing. I'm not sure if I feel motivated today or if I'm stumping along. It doesn't matter.

Either way, you're moving forward.

With rebel love,

Christina

P.S. Know someone who needs a jolt out of boredom? Forward this newsletter to them. They can sign up to be catapulted out of boredom for 1-2 minutes a week by signing up here.