I Email (Text), Therefore I Am

Time to read: Email Mastery - Part 2 of 2. 1 minute and 15 seconds to read.

Last week I wrote about email as a distraction that we call "work." This week, I want to highlight another way that email invades your consciousness. First, a little background:

As an executive coach, I work from home, and I spend a lot of time with my dog alone. As an uber extrovert, I've been surprised at how ok I am with this arrangement. And, I love connecting - with friends, on the phone with clients, the person at the checkout counter, and other parents at my children's school. I love email. Email gives me an easy way to connect with all of you, and a great way to keep in touch with friends in countries far away.

And, email can get out of hand.

Geez, I hate to even admit this.

At times, email gives me a reason for being. Texting does, too. Tell me if you've ever experienced this (please really do tell me so I don't feel so weird): It's the weekend and you check your email more frequently than perhaps is necessary since no one is online, except they are, and when you receive an email (or a text), you get a little dopamine hit that says, "thank goodness, I matter."

Wow. Did I really admit that?

Here's the thing. I'm saying this as much for my sake as for yours. Your email does not equal your mattering. In fact, you matter just because you do, even if you never received another email in your entire life.

What does matter is your ability to connect. You matter because you show up, you're kind, and you make a difference in the communities you occupy, at work and in life. Your presence makes a difference to the people you love and even to the strangers who cross your path. That matters.

Your email has nothing to do with it, even if it feels like it sometimes. So, you really can put it down.

With rebel love,


P.S. Wanna share the mattering with your friends? You can! Just forward this email to them and they can join us here.


Who you are being matters!

Estimated read time: 4 seconds less than one minute.

Pets and kids get this concept without trying.

Pets and kids get this concept without trying.

Like you, I have a lot to do this week - a long list of tasks, mundane and challenging. A few minutes ago, I was walking out the door laden with my laptop, anxious to start knocking items off my to-do list at the local coffee shop.

Right as I was about to leave, I stopped and remembered the words of my mentor. She said, "Trust that who you are is enough. Do your prep work and trust who you are being in the world." I put down my laptop and spent the next 20 minutes meditating.

The point here is simple. What you do is only part of the story. Who you are is just as important.

Here's an example:

One of my clients leads a large team. She is responsible for day-to-day management activities and projects that affect thousands of end-users. At her core, she is deeply empathetic. When she gets anxious about the things that need to be done, she has a harder time moving forward. When she taps into her deep well of compassion for herself and her team, the work gets done smoothly.

See how that works?

In the midst of all of your doing, remember who you are being is important, too. Have you heard the phrase, "you are a human being, not a human doing?"

Spend some time this week paying attention to who you are being. And my calm and centered self just easily completed one thing on my to-do list - this newsletter!

In love,


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